Another day, another appointment at the Cancer Clinic, another extension to this whole process.
Every time I think its the end I go to the appointment thinking its all over and there is no need to have anyone come with me because it will be fine. Then I go, by myself, and get told its not the end. I’m not going to lie, I was expecting this. Expecting this because that’s just how things go for me. Not one surgery but two, not one treatment but two.
The Radioactive Iodine treatment went well. The follow up scan showed two spots, one on the side of my neck and one in the back, that were glowing indicating they had taken up quite a bit of radioactive iodine, meaning the spots contained Cancerous cells. But the fact that they were glowing basically meant they the cells were killed.
The weird part is that I went for a blood test after my treatment and certain levels came back higher then normal, which doesn’t make any sense and the doctors don’t know what to make of it. They don’t thinks its anything serious, but they don’t know what it means. The course of action they are taking is to monitor my blood over the next 4 months and see if the levels level out or not. If they don’t then I will most likely have to go for another dose of Radioactive Iodine sometime in the Spring.
For the love of Jesus, isolation AGAIN!?
All those years of wishing I lived under a rock by myself are coming to fruition.
After hearing of the news I was of course disappointed because I was really hoping this was the end of it all, but I realized, there probably is never going to be an end. I will always get tested, I will always have to go back for more things, and if anything looks funny, I will have to be Radioactive again. I guess part of me is alarmed by the news, but to be honest, if it really was anything serious, I would be in there next week getting it done, not 5 months from now.
So, in the wise words of Todd Bertuzzi, it is what it is. There is no sense in sitting her in a pile of depression wondering ‘Why me?’ It is what it is, and its obviously just something I’ve got to go through. So onward and upward.
I’m sure 24 years of negativity hasn’t helped the situation.
on October 13th, 2009 at 4:04 pm
I know it’s typical to say, chin up, stay positive, etc… but what else can you do?
You have to troop on and make the best of it. You are right though, if it were serious, they would not wait, so that is a positive, even if it isn’t over. Sadly yes, you will always have to monitor your health now. But better to be aware and on top of your health right? A slight annoyance with the endless tests to come, but better to be alive and aware right?
Just look around at all the wonderful things you have in your life, a husband, love, friends, family, a career you enjoy. Take the joy of that and run with it.
INTERNET HUGS
on October 14th, 2009 at 6:53 am
:( It’s such a pain when it drags on and you just want it all to be done with and put it behind you as much as you can while still having to have checkups every few months. You’ll get there though.
If it makes you feel a little bit better my scan results after my first radioactive iodine treatment were that bad that my oncologist called me within days and I had major surgery within weeks (much worse than the thyroidectomy) and then a larger dose of iodine a few months later. But in spite of all of that all my tests since then have been clear and it’ll be 5 years since the last treatment in January. That doesn’t mean I’m not convinced it’s going to come back some time though. As you say, it’ll never entirely be over, but it does get better, it just takes time and patience.
At least if you do have to do the radiation again you know what to expect and can prepare yourself. http://www.thyca.org has information on the diet and some recipes and things that might come in handy. I know it’s much harder over there though as you have iodine in your salt whereas we don’t. If you do need to do it again (and hopefully you won’t) I can send you some iodine-free salt if you want.
*hugs*
on October 14th, 2009 at 9:28 am
*hugs*
on October 14th, 2009 at 11:01 am
This time around isolation won’t be so bad because…
1) You know what to expect
2) You can pack real food this time and have a happy tummy
3) Chad will know to call you so you dont have to deal with trying to use a broken phone
4) We will all come visit you so it won’t feel like such a long time
5) You can bring more magazine and perhaps a book you can throw out to help pass time
You are a cancer survivor, they just want to keep it that way!
big hug for you (without actually touching you because I’m a walking germ!)
on October 15th, 2009 at 1:56 pm
Love your hair in this picture