Mosquito Killer, Qu’est Que C’est?

Posted on August 17, 2010 by Smelly Danielly

The other night I woke up to a mosquito buzzing in my ear. I swatted it away but didn’t worry about it because I knew it would get Chad 100 times before it got me.

Not to long later I rolled over, half awake, towards Chad. He reached out and asked me if I was awake. I was, so he asked me if I heard a mosquito buzzing around. Well, it was driving him absolutely crazy and he had already been bitten 4 times. Haha, sucker! He then told me that he needed to kill it right away because he could not sleep with it buzzing around. His plan? To turn on all the lights and wait for the mosquito to fly towards them and then attack it.

It was 3:45 in the morning.

I was surprisingly in a good mood so I indulged him.

I attempted to cover my face from the light attack but there was no point. I knew I wasn’t going to sleep through this.

So, there he was, all covered up, staring at his bed side light waiting for the mosquito to come and attack. We waited, we watched, we saw it once, but didn’t get it in time.

30 minutes later, I told him that time was up, so he came up with a brilliant idea – that he should have originally just done – and decided to turn on the fan so to blow the bugger out of the way.

Well, it worked. The mosquito never came back, and I was punished with Ciavarro-esque gas attacks blown in my face by the fan.

Just a night in the life.

Hide Your Kids, Hide Your Wife

Posted on August 16, 2010 by Smelly Danielly

If you only do one thing today, it should be watching these videos…

Death by Explosion

Posted on August 16, 2010 by Smelly Danielly

Things that occurred in our apartment this weekend due to the heat…

Chads deoderant melted so when he went to use it and pulled the top off it exploded all over the bathroom.
The Steri Strips and tape covering my sliced up thumb (Yes, I had another kitchen/knife accident) got way too hot causing the glue that holds them down to melt and spread all over my thumb. I now have a gross, sticky, dirty thumb.
While adjusting the fan on Saturday, it moved in such a way that the blades hit the metal case they spin around in and shattered into a million pieces; right in Chads face. I was not home for this, but I got the play by play. His face is ok, the fan, not so much. We are still finding plastic shards everywhere.
Due to the fact that our fan broke and our apartment is literally a sauna, there was no sleep Saturday night. There were, however, many 3am freezies and panic attacks that the heat was actually suffocating me. FUN! We ended up just getting up at 9am, despite our lack of sleep, just so we could drive around in Chads air conditioned car.
The heat in the apartment cause presure to build up in my purfume bottle which caused it to explode purfume out the top little nozzle thing and out everywhere. Sure the bathroom now smells nice, but my expensive purfume is almost all gone. F U SUMMER.
Our ghetto fridge can not handle this heat and has been working overtime, which means it sounds like a Semi Truck is driving through our kitchen for hours. I kid you not.
The new fan we got to replace the old one is 10 times more powerful. This is positive when it’s hot out and you want to cool down, but it is negative when you are trying to sleep. The lowest speed on this thing is faster and louder then the top speed of the old one. It was so loud this morning that I couldn’t even hear my alarm. I just can’t win.
The amount of things that have exploded, melted, and died, all due to the heat in our apartment is overwhelming. I’m pretty sure Chad and I will be next.

The Real Dinner for Shmucks

Posted on August 12, 2010 by Smelly Danielly

Headed over to Mr. Perizzolos on Saturday for a Summer BBQ in the rain. He had the table nicely set and everything ready to go before we even got there. Shit, he was more prepared then I am for most dinners!

We were told to arrive around 6pm. Chad and I were early birds because we couldn’t wait. Shannon & Kelly arrived non to short after, but the damn Tyrrells were too busy making out to show up on time ;) Actually, it was that damn HWY 1 that is going to annoy us all to hell by the time it’s finished being upgraded.

This man…who does he think he is?

I was bringing back 1985, just for Ryan.

Dinner for Shmucks!

Dario served us Chicken & Beef burgers, salad and fries, not to mention an abundance of wine.

Before all the cool people showed up Chad, Dario and I were having a conversation about the flow of his house. While doing so we collaborated and came up with a great idea to knock down half of this wall to create a bar.

While re-telling this story at dinner something was said about whether or not Dario would actually have the motivation to build this bar. Well, no sooner was that said, but the hammer was taken out (from it’s convenient cubby in the kitchen) and smashed into the wall, providing ample amount of motivation for Dario to get on it!

Just because it’s not his party doesn’t mean he can’t control the evening!

Mr. Photographer at work.

Ryan clearly thinks he is just too cool.

You seriously can’t take him out of the house.

Sporadic Moment of Proof #2

Apparently one drunken evening the question was asked, can Dario throw the football over his house? Well, it wasn’t solved that evening, but it sure was solved on Saturday. Dario threw a perfect pass to Chad from one side of the yard to the other, then did the exact same thing back to Ryan. To say the question was answered would be an understatement. It was like Christmas morning for those boys.

This then meant that football had to be played in the house as well.

We found out that Kelly was unable to catch any sort of ball, so Chad gave her a lesson. Chad is good at catching balls…

While the boys were in the kitchen discussing world politics, the girls somehow got into an impromptu yoga lesson. Now, I have never done a minute of yoga in my life, but Kelly showed me a few poses and it was like I was a natural, which I actually found very surprising. I actually couldn’t believe how much of a work out I got and how sore I was the next day. It was pretty damn amazing.

Who know what was going on in here.

Where is Kelly!?

Kelly and Shannon are sisters and good friends of my cousin Francesca. I’ve known them for a while, Chad has known them some and they met Dario for the first time at Ryan and Elise wedding. The group of us really hit it off at the wedding and it was great having them over for dinner on Saturday. Shannon is actually going to be in Italy at the same time as us so we’ve planned to meet up, which we are both really excited about. I really hope we plan more events with these two lovely ladies in the future!

An awesome Saturday evening as usual with our favourites. The boys ended it outside on the patio with Scotch, and the girls decided to watch Knocked Up the uncensored edit, filled with ‘head popping’ scenes. Ick!

Blame It On The Rain

Posted on August 9, 2010 by Smelly Danielly

It’s kind of weird that it all of a sudden feels like November. It’s also kind of weird that the weather outside takes up so much of my thought and conversation.

I went to bed late Saturday night. 3am late. Chad fell asleep on the couch and I didn’t wake him. I don’t know why he came home and decided to lay on the couch and not the bed, but that’s where he ended up, so I let him be. I can never function properly after a night of going to bed at 3am. It didn’t help that I had some very bizarre dreams as well. I don’t know why the people you hate have to pop into your dreams and ruin your sleep. That’s just rude.

Yesterday we did nothing. All plans were canceled due to the rain. I would have liked to sleep on the couch all day. That was the kind of day it felt like.

We drove out to South Surrey for din din with the In-Laws. On our way out there Chad and I were talking about how it would be the perfect day for comfort food. I asked him what his idea of comfort food was. Lasagna was his dish of choice. Mine? Roast and potatoes. We got to the house, and low and behold Chads mom had read my mind. She basically made all of my favorite comfort food dishes. Roast Beef, Beer Can Chicken, Roasted Potatoes, Yorkshire Pudding, Green Beans, Egg Fried Zucchini, and Garlic Bread. DROOL. Of course, no matter how starving you are, it’s way too hard to eat all of that because comfort food is kind of heavy, but I was loving every minute of it. It’s so awesome when someone serves you what you are craving with out even knowing that you are craving it.

As soon as we got on the road for home, all the wine, and food, and late nights hit me and I was out like a light. I was hoping I would sleep like a rock, but all the weird dreams came back and I was tossing and turning all night long. It was not a good sleep by any means. I then woke up to my calf muscle cramping and I was in totally pain for 5 minutes. Thats the second time in a month it’s happened to me. It’s so sore now.

Humm…would it be weird if I got Chad to build a fire tonight? That is totally what I feel like.